It’s all just a popularity contest… and I’m losing

Posted: September 2, 2011 in comedy
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

So, I recently posted a video on this little known website which you’ve probably never heard of called “YouTube”. It was a collaborative effort between me and Johannesburg comedian, Deep Fried Man. It received over 8000 hits in 3 days which makes it the greatest thing I have ever done (in YouTube terms – by about 7920 hits, seems people weren’t that interested in footage of my first set). Just to put that into perspective, this video received about as many hits as this blog gets in a month, in about 10 hours.

I’m not sure whether to chalk it down to the fact that it really is a good video (which you are more than welcome to check out for yourself ( ), whether this blog is not actually that good, or if it’s just that Deep Fried is just way more popular than me, but my mom says that’s not the case.

But could it be that I’m not actually that popular? I mean I have a fair few fans on facebook and a few followers on Twitter, but it’s quite easy to become obsessed with these numbers, like it’s some sort of score and he who dies with most followers, wins. It’s like this uncontrollable gold rush for the souls of followers. Even God and Satan are at it with @satan having 23369 followers, while @god has 71337 (whether this is the one true God we’ve been looking for is unknown since the account hasn’t been verified, but then who has the nerve to demand God verifies his account?) Although both would be completely dominated if Kim Kardashian had to form a religion with her 9.4 million followers… although I do believe that is one of the signs of the apocalypse.

These numbers – followers, fans, friends, likes and views! One can get totally obsessed with them completely wearing out the F5 key on your keyboard.

It really is demoralising to look at some of the other things that have more fans than I do on facebook. For example I have barely a fraction of the fans that “Music” has (and yes I mean “music” not even a particular genre) which as of 30 August 2011 had 2,6billion fans and “Movies” had 11billion – COME ON! I like Movies and Music too…like me! Anyway what kind of ridiculous fan page is that to follow? Music? Who the hell doesn’t like music? Not even deaf people hate music. I’m calling Bullshit!

But that’s not where the humiliation stops; I have nowhere near as many fans as “headaches”. Yes that throbbing, pulsing excruciating and blinding pain that can be completely debilitating, has more fans on facebook than I do with 2176 fans. To make it worse, “Death” has more fans… A LOT more fans. Seriously?! Death?! The End of it all? Lack of Life? The thing we all spend billions on trying to avoid for our entire lives has more fans than a guy who makes people laugh? I call Bullshit!

I’m just stoked I beat out belly button lint (not by much though) which only has 240 fans… seriously?!?


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